I wake up every morning to embrace my very early morning run through the dusty, trash-burning air, down a small path here in Nicaragua. And although I may be exhausted and unhappy to be up at such an early hour I can’t help but realize that love has no language barrier. Although it is around six in the morning there is always someone walking the path to greet us with a “Buenos Dias” and a smile. We might also be greeted by the street dogs (who may or may not attack us), or a horse, pig, or other random animal… but that’s beside the point. When I return from my run I am greeted by the Nicaraguan staff and their big beautiful smiles (cooks, cleaning staff, guards, etc.). As my day continues I constantly am reminded of God’s love through the smiles and laughter amongst everyone here. Let me tell you about just a few instances:
Ingri is her name, and she has definitely stolen part of my heart. On our way to a worksite in the morning Ingri rides with us until we drop her and her family off in town. Every morning her big smile and little voice yells out “Amy” as she motions me to come and sit next to her. We sit as close as humanly possible without literally being on top of each other. We use the ride to Leon to stroke each other’s hair or back, it is the absolute best way possible to start of my day!
Eddie, well let’s just say we were made to be best friends. Eddie is a seventeen-year-old guy who lives in Betel and helps us work at many of the worksites. The first week we were here we decided that we would help each other out, I would help him learn English, if he helped me learn Spanish. Although this had great intentions, we always end up completely confused busting out in laughter. Eddie along with his friend Jose really enjoy joking around with us and making fun of our Spainglish.
YaYa, YeYe, Yahariah… we call her many different names but she is one special woman. Some other girls and myself love to go and sit at her house with her and her abuela (grandma) and just chat. If you met Yaya she would tell you that she doesn’t speak any English and she would also come across as being very tough. But both of those things couldn’t be farther from the truth. Yaya speaks a ton of English and is very good at speaking; also she is definitely a lover not a fighter and has become one of my great Nicaraguan friends. She is also wonderful at making bracelets, which is something else that just makes my love for her even greater, and also I am pretty sure I keep her in bracelet making business!
Judith, Elizabeth, and Carlita, these are probably the sweetest girls in all of Nicaragua. They are always willing to paint our nails, do our hair, or sit and listen to our horrible Spanish for hours while we try to communicate with them. These girls fill me up with complete joy; God uses them in my life so much to show me that you can love without ever saying a word.
Those are some everyday instances that I love being able to experience while living here in Nicaragua and those people listed above are just a few of the people here in Nicaragua that are so near and dear to my heart.
But the most precious example of God’s love through a smile came on Friday morning when we visited an orphanage with special needs children. Coming from a past of working with special needs children I was not too concerned with how I would handle their disabilities or that it would be anything foreign for me. Although, I quickly found that the children there were suffering from way more than just mental disabilities. Many of these children were deformed and could not even sit up on their own. Almost all of these children could not speak at all or really do anything independently. At first I was taken aback feeling completely inadequate but once I went up to a little boy named Mario-Jesus all my fears subsided and I wanted nothing more than to show God’s love to him. Mario-Jesus was one of the children that was deformed and could not even sit up on his own. Although he could not move at all on his own, he was able to hold my hand and I was overjoyed to find that he could squeeze my hand back and show his love for me as well. Mario-Jesus had the most amazing big brown eyes I had ever seen. I immediately stared into those big eyes and started praying for God to work in his life. I prayed that someday whether on earth or in heaven that God would heal him and that he would no longer feel pain. I also started to pray that God would fill him with joy and His love while I was sitting there holding his small precious hands. Moments after I prayed this, his face full of joy lit up and he smiled the most amazing smile I have ever seen. I spent the next hour and half just gazing into his eyes praying for God to fill him up with love, and it was the most rewarding experience I have had since being here in Nicaragua. That hour and a half flew by, I seriously could have spent the whole day sitting holding this small boy’s hands and enjoying the love God was showing me through him.
You see one reason that I felt so connected to this little guy was because I saw him than more than just a sweet innocent special needs child, when I looked into Mario-Jesus’ eyes I saw someone way more familiar, I saw myself. This is the way God loves me, He sits there knowing that I am absolutely crippled by my own selfish desires, knowing that sometimes I cannot even spiritually hold myself up. In a spiritual well being health, I am very similar to this small boy that I met at the orphanage. God knows that I can sometimes do nothing more than stare into His eyes fixed upon the love He has for me, but it’s in those times that is when He holds me close delighted in the fact that I am smiling up at Him. I am beyond blessed and grateful that I had the opportunity to visit this orphanage and meet little Mario-Jesus, his smile taught me way more than any words could have ever expressed.
One last commentary to this very extensive blog that I want you all to be aware of is the activity I did with the girls on my team during our “girls day”. Our female leader Shawndell challenged us with the verses Isaiah 62:2-5 which reads,
“The nations will see your righteousness. World leaders will be blinded by your glory. And you will be given a new name by the Lord’s own mouth. The Lord will hod you in his hand for all to see- a splendid crown in the hand of God. Never again will you be called ‘The Forsaken City’ or ‘The Desolate Land.’ Your new name will be “The City of God’s Delight” and “The Bride of God,” for the Lord delights in you and will claim you as his bride. Your children will commit themselves to you, O Jerusalem, just as a young man commits himself to his bride. Then God will rejoice over you as a bridegroom rejoices over his bride.”
Shawndell challenged us to spend time before the Lord and ask Him to give us a new name just as He had done with Jerusalem, then we would paint these new names on a piece of cardboard and share them with one another. The name the Lord spoke to me was “Flawless”. I found freedom and love in this new name, since before in my life I walked in a spirit of shame and feeling like I would never quite live up to the status quo. But I found that God delights in me and that because of Jesus blood He sees me as being completely Flawless and made me exactly who I am for a specific purpose, He would have me no other way.
Sorry for such a lengthy blog, thanks for taking interest in my journey here in Nicaragua!
In Him,
Amy Crow
