no library big enough to hold all the books

As I write this, there is a bird flying around in our room and scratching along the metal rafters. Today, just like any other day, I killed more spiders than I can count. I just flicked a praying mantis off my bed and I’ve quit swatting the bugs off my computer because their guts just make streaks on the screen afterwards. I hear crickets, frogs, and fireworks outside. I hear roosters crowing every morning. I struggle to keep a smooth breathing pattern as I run through clouds of dust and smoke from burning trash piles. Sometimes, you could play connect the dots in between the bug bites that cover my legs. My knees are almost black, either from dirt stains or them being the tannest part on my body. And, just to be honest, so is the tissue when I blow my nose at the end of the day. The green mangos the kids feed us are sour and make my jaws hurt. We check the peanut butter and jelly before we spread it on our bread to make sure the ants didn’t get to it before us. I’ve eaten more beans in the past month than in my whole life combined… rice too… and tortillas. I miss my family and friends, Edenton and Wilmington. I sometimes feel like I don’t have enough alone time as I share a room with 9 other girls. My malaria medicine sometimes makes my stomach hurt. I only get internet once a week. It’s so hot here. On Saturday and Sunday, I wake up around 5:30 because my internal alarm clock is used to that time during the weeks. We have no A/C. We take cold showers.
 
And, as I write this, I can’t believe how blessed I am. Sometimes I feel guilty because I feel like I’m on vacation. Literally. Yes, I said I feel like I’m on vacation, in spite of all that I just mentioned about my daily life. That list could go on and on. But I’m not complaining.
 
Because, you see, as I write this the bird probably wouldn’t be in our room if a snake was in sight. Those spiders and frogs most definitely eat some of the bugs that would otherwise bite me or crawl across my computer screen. The fireworks are constant and loud, but much better than if they were gunshots. The roosters remind me that another day is here, and His mercies are new every morning. I watch the sun come up and hear God tell me, “good morning beautiful” as I suck in that thick, dirty air and thank Him for giving me lungs, legs, and the ability to run. I must be sweet to the mosquitoes if they like to bite me this much… and when I’m tempted to scratch those bug bites, my mind goes back to the sweet memory of my dad scratching them for me while I laid in his recliner. The dirt on my knees just shows that I must be working hard and playing harder and accomplishing something, and I’m thankful for the sunshine that kisses my skin each day. God designed our noses and immune system with great defense against what otherwise would go into my lungs. Those mangos will be ripe and wonderful and amazing in just a couple of weeks. Pineapple jelly is the best in the world and the peanut butter is simply made of 3 natural ingredients; no wonder the ants want it too. I won’t know what to do without beans, rice, and tortillas with every meal when I come back to the States in May. I’ve gained a new family, my teammates and the people of Nicaragua, and I’ll be reunited with my loved ones at home who are reading this in a little over 2 months. It’s pretty cool that I can add another country and city to the list of places I’ve been and lived, and I still only live about 20 minutes from the beach. God knew what He was doing when He grew me up near the coast. Today, as I stayed behind from the beach to get more rest, I missed my team and kept thinking of things I wanted to tell them but couldn’t because they weren’t here. That medicine will keep me from getting a horrible disease; so what if it makes me feel bad for a little while after I take it. I’m thankful the house I live in has wifi and I don’t have to walk miles to an internet café to catch up with a little of what’s going on in the rest of the world. And going online once a week is plenty often; any more would dampen my spirits and distract me from what’s going on here. I’ve always, always been a summer kind of girl and said it’s my favorite season. I love waking up early even on the weekends; I simply walk outside, fall into a hammock, read, pray, and rest more in the Lord’s presence. The breeze through our living room is perfect and sometimes I actually wake up a little chilly in the mornings. That cold shower feels amazing at the end of the day, or sometimes, smack in the middle of an extra hot day.
 
So, you can see for yourself that the pros far outweigh the cons. I’m loving life here. God is blessing me richly. The happenings of my life are teaching me so much of what’s revealed through Jesus’ words in the gospels… Lose your life and you’ll find it; become less and less so He becomes more and more… and more and more. And what’s even greater than all He’s teaching me and showing me and all the small pleasures He’s given me here is the fact that the fruit of the relationships He’s created with the people here will last forever. Both their relationships with me and their relationships with God. I love them and love seeing God in them. “My nourishment comes from doing the will of God, who sent me, and from finishing His work… I say, wake up and look around. The fields are already ripe for harvest. The harvesters are paid good wages, and the fruit they harvest is people brought to eternal life.” (John 4:34-36)
 
He’s paying me very well… a wage far better than what I deserve.
 
As I write this, I realize I could go on and on and on about the work that Jesus is doing in people and give you stories far better than the above sentences about the physical aspects of life. But, the spiritual aspects are far sweeter, far more positive, and far more difficult to put into words. So I’ll quote John again, “There are SO many other things Jesus did. If they were all written down, each of them, one by one, I can’t imagine a world big enough to hold such a library of books.” (21:25 msg.)