As I sat down for church service at NewSong after playing a worship set that Marcus, Shawndell and I got asked to do 15 minutes before church started (we keep it exciting here in Nica), I decided to get out my journal and write down some thoughts I was getting.
At first, they were just about how in awe I was of the way God was working in the lives of the community at NewSong, the ways He was changing their lives and ways of thinking.
And as I was writing, all I could think of was how much I want to be a part of that!
To be so filled with the Spirit that it just overflows onto everyone around you.
To be contagious with joy.
To truly be God's mouthpiece to this generation.
To be a part of something so big, it can change the community. The country. The world.
To be living in my giftings.
To realize my true potential and how capable I am.
To do things that people say could never happen.
It seems impossible to change hearts.
People have things so deeply ingrained in them.
The devil uses that in such terrible ways.
He leads us to believe that there is no hope.
But there is!
Jesus himself is hope!
Hope of a future.
Of purpose.
Romans 8:21 says that God has placed a hope in us that creation will one day be liberated from its slavery to corruption and experience freedom.
One day, we will be completely free of any chains that still hold us captive to sin.
What glorious freedom that will be!
Until then, my goal is to be rid of and break as many of those chains that I can at this temporary home.
To try and pursue as much freedom as possible.
But not by human methods.
Not by my own power.
No, I could never destroy the bonds I've created with the enemy.
Years of human tendencies, of living by my own desires have built up so many walls guarding my heart from truth.
I could never even imagine having the willpower to change my mindset so drastically.
But my powerful, loving Abba has offered me a life of freedom from all of that junk.
And I think, how could I refuse that?
Yes God! Take over my heart!
Consume me with your love!
It's not always easy; It's completely possible to want to control my life again.
But Jesus promises me something way better.
Hope.
Freedom.
Unconditional love.
And those are impossible to re-create by my own power.
It's something that gives me purpose. Passion. It makes life an adventure.
One that I know I will never fail in if my faith is always in my Father.
And yes, I do want it that way.
