If there is anything that the Lord is teaching me during my time here, it is that He is the only one who can change me. Let me explain.
Upon arriving to Ometepe, you could say that I experienced a bit of culture shock. Satan was definitely doing everything in his power to make me not want to be here. But God called me here. And He was going to fight for me and the calling He placed on my life.
So, I began to try to change my heart and mind. I did everything in my power to find joy in my circumstances and to make myself believe that this is where I wanted to be. But each day, I was let down and sorely disappointed that I felt the same. Why was I not all in? Why was my heart fighting what God wanted for me?
Maybe, it is because I am incapable of changing my own heart. Only the Lord can do that.
So, I woke up one morning, and asked Him to change me. To change my heart and my mind and to make His desires my own. To give me joy in all that I was doing, and to be well equipped for the inevitable attacks of the enemy. I prayed for Him to move within me, and as always, He was faithful to do so.
That day, it was like there was a breakthrough. The Lord shattered all the walls that were blocking me from fully experiencing what He had in store for me. There was joy and love and hope all around me as I felt His glorious presence.
Why is this never my first reaction to things? Why do I not immediately go to Him with my struggles?
I was sitting in a hammock one afternoon, when I heard the Lord clearly speak to me. He said with great authority, "Don´t you dare put me in a box!"
I pondered what He meant by that, and then I realized that I constantly place limitations on the power he possesses. I constantly try to do things myself that only He is capable of doing. I put His power in a box, and only let Him out when I think I need Him.
How foolish I can be sometimes. I need Him always. Instead of exhausting myself with trying to control the uncontrollable, I need to just let Him release His power and presence upon me and let Him do the work He is dying to do.
Give Him the control. Let Him work within you and do the impossible. He changes hearts, and He is most certainly changing mine.
"Now to Him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to His power that is at work within us, to Him be the glory in the church and in Jesus Christ throughout all generations, forever and ever!" Ephesians 3:20-21.
